Friday, June 10, 2005

the skinny on me
Hello, my name is Lisa and I am 5'11 tall, medium build (except my hips, which could house triplets and their trikes), I have size 7 feet and a 34C bust. Once, at university, I gained a whole heap of podge and was around 13 stone, but most people thought I looked okay - my mum said that I could tone up a bit. When TA and I met I was hovering around the 11 stone mark and wore size 14 to 16 clothes, some of which were rather loose. In the run up to our wedding I lost a fair bit of weight and dropped to under 9 and a half stone, but most people thought I looked great - one male friend said I was too thin. I thought my thighs were still too fat, but enjoyed the flat stomach and the compliments. Once the wedding snaps came back I was shocked at how skinny my arms were and how bony I looked, yuck. I relaxed a bit and gained a few pounds. After the wedding I had all my favourite clothes tailored to fit since I was swimming around in them and it was cheaper than buying new ones. I stayed at around the 10 stone mark for over a year - I was happy with how I looked and maintained this weight without feeling deprived.
Then I quit my job and spent three months having a crisis about not being able to find a new one, I ate. I ate a lot, some of it reappeared as my bullimia returned. Then I started a new job where there were bagels every morning. I eventually joined a gym to compensate for eating bagels. Then I went to America on a work trip and ate, and ate, and ate! When I returned TA hardly recognised me - my face had changed shape! Back to the gym. In January I cut back on cakes and biscuits and began to lose weight again. My clothes were beginning to fit...but then we moved office, I started partying with co-workers and eating out and then snacking from the free vending machine. My clothes no longer fitted.
So. This time I mean business, the last 18 months - nearly getting back in shape only for it all to be ruined by eating and drinking like a mad thing - have really pissed me off. I have no idea how much I currently weigh but I imagine I'm currently closer to 11 stone than 10 stone. I prefer to be around 10 stone. I currently wear size 12 mostly, but sometimes wear size 10 tops or size 14 trousers. It will be enough for me to lose the half an inch off each thigh and inch round the middle, that's all it will take for me to feel back to normal again.
To achive this I am following a sensible diet of mainly fruit and veggies with low-fat protein and healthy, low-GI complex carbs and have cut out caffeine and alcohol - caffeine because it keeps me out of the kitchen and away from the chocolate dispenser, alcohol because I'd been partying too much. I suspect that it will only take a few more weeks before everything is back to normal.
Through all the ups and downs though, no one has ever thought I needed to lose a bit of weight except me and TA. It constantly amazes me how differently others see me from how I see myself. (And Tim, what on earth was it about my writing that made you think I'd be a strapping lass?) There's another woman at work who is my height and skinny but big-boned and yet everyone thinks she's very, very tall while I'm merely tall - I've no idea why. I often feel like a scyscraper surrounded by bungalows.
There, that's the skinny on me.

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